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Skyla Dawn Cameron

My characters kill people so I don't have to.

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Nov 11 2017

Survivor ≠ Broken

This originally appeared this summer as my monthly writing-related essay for Patrons of Snark. With the very public reckoning currently taking place against men who have sexually assaulted/harassed people (primarily women), and the rather relevant subplot in Odin’s Spear, it seemed relevant to post now. It’s edited slightly from the original version. For exclusive monthly writing essays, check out Patreon!

If you’re stressed/triggered by the discussions lately, skip this one if needed.

This post also contains spoilers for the Livi Talbot books, specifically Odin’s Spear. That book came out in February, however, which means plenty of time to have read it. Read on if you’d like background on why I made certain story decisions.


“Why is there so much rape in fiction?” It’s the common refrain among readers and writers alike, and I’ve asked the same question. The three most common irritating places it’s seen: to give a tough heroine a tragic backstory, to give male characters motivation (when their wife/sister/daughter is raped), and to to add “realism” since the world is a terrible place.

A whole lot of it is bullshit, tbh. A whole lot of writers misuse this terrible thing that happens to real people because they’re lazy storytellers, ignorant, or just don’t give a shit. And fiction as a whole could use a lot less rape.

But knowing all that, I still include characters who are survivors of rape, molestation, and intimate partner violence in my books–it’s a deliberate, conscious choice, and one I stand behind. I’ve blogged before about Why I Write the Terrible Things I Write. That post was written partly referencing Livi’s books, but they hadn’t been published so I didn’t go into detail.

While it’s more alluded to in Solomon’s Seal and not outright said (that I can recall?), I will explicitly say it: Livi Talbot is a rape survivor. 

That was a deliberate choice on my part: much like I wanted to write a single mom who was a badass adventurer, I also wanted a book about a rape survivor that is also fun.

Because whatever has happened to her, Livi is not broken.

This thing–this terrible, unspeakable thing she has gone through–is a facet of her character, but doesn’t define her. It changed her, but so did the other major experiences in her life. I don’t say this to minimize the experience or deny how that trauma stays with her–because it has, it’s very much apart of her, even if she doesn’t focus on it in her narrative.

Stories where trauma clings to survivors are necessary. Ana Fidatov was deeply damaged by the intimate partner violence and horror she experienced, so much so that she had to reinvent herself as a new person for the next three hundred years in Zara Lain; Dessa and Vaughn, neither of whom you’ve met yet, have been through horror in their young lives and both struggle to navigate the world carrying the weight of it for the duration of that (unpublished, five-book) series.

Just as necessary, IMO, are the stories where survivors reach a point of being happy. Where they can have relationships, where they can thrive. Where they can jump in a dragon’s mouth to defeat it and kick a yeti in the balls. Being raped by an intimate partner did not change the fact that Livi is a badass adventurer at heart, nor did it cause her to become a badass adventurer.

Similarly, it was a deliberate choice to introduce someone in Livi’s life in the form of Richard Moss.

He tramples all over her boundaries and gives off red flags she ignores, because all of us have those blindspots. No matter what we’ve been through, no matter how far we think we’ve come, the rape culture we live in–that women are raised in–is something that has to be constantly pushed back against. And Richard was part of that, particularly in Odin’s Spear.  Over and over she doubts her gut feeling about him, over and over she feels confident she can handle him. Livi grew up around men like him, who feel entitled to whatever they want–when she was raped as a teenager, it was very similar to the situation she finds herself in with him–and when that’s so heavily ingrained in you, it’s a pattern that’s easy to fall back into.

Fighting back has consequences that reverberate throughout the next couple of books because rejecting an intimate partner isn’t a triumphant moment that saves the day–he doesn’t crawl back under his rock, never to be heard from again. That sting to Richard’s ego, his inability to have power over her, doesn’t go away. He still slut-shames her at every chance; he uses every opportunity to drag her through the mud, to affect her reputation and career. (If I can promise you anything, however, it’s that he will fucking get his eventually.)

I don’t write stories about survivors to add a level of realism, but to add a level of transformation–to show consequences to rape, to combat rape culture by placing the culpability on the perpetrator.

It allows me to have a moment where Pru can simply say to Livi in Zheng’s Tomb “It’s not your fault” and have every woman who sees herself in Livi hear it too.

It allows me to contrast Richard’s inability to say no with another (future) romantic partner of Livi’s immediately backing off the moment he senses she’s physically uncertain.

It allows me to revisit a moment for all women who wanted to fight back and couldn’t, and have Livi beat the hell out of her attacker and get away.

It allows me to show everyone on the ship–even people Livi doesn’t know–demonstrate that they have her back, guns ready, to run Richard off.

Not everyone has a supportive friend, or the ability to fight back, or a network with rifles telling an entitled man to fuck off, but if I can find a way to share that in fiction, maybe I can give someone a little hope.

So as a writer, if you’re tackling rape in fiction, I say nothing should ever be off the table, but you have to question your motivations for writing it.

  • Is it to put the heroine in danger so the hero can save her? Nope, not a good enough reason.
  • Is it to motivate the hero when a woman in his life is raped? Yeah, don’t do that either.
  • How about making the story seem more “real” because women always get raped, right? Uh, do better, motherfucker.
  • To give your heroine a traumatic backstory? There are so. many. better. ways. Seriously.

But exploring the aftermath, having your characters push back against rape culture and victim-blaming, and/or exploring what happened to you in a safe setting where you can maybe change the outcome? All valid choices.

At its core, Livi’s story is about a woman who has not had an easy life but isn’t broken by it. A survivor who keeps rising and surviving, finding love and laughter and comfort with her found family. Someone who can say to others, “This thing happened to me but I’ve reached a point of being okay, and you can have hope that you will be okay too.”

And that’s something I hope readers, whatever they’ve survived in life, can identify with.

Written by Skyla Dawn Cameron · Categorized: blog · Tagged: livi talbot, writing

Nov 06 2017

Update on The Purge

Well, it’s been three weeks since this post. How’s it working out for me?

First, a room a week just has not been feasible. Not only with work and volunteer stuff eating my time, but not having a vehicle means I have to ask for help to transport garbage or items for donation, and I hate asking for help. But I’m chipping away and finding things working for me. Here are some areas, both from the book I mentioned and my own trial and error that help.

 

Kitchen

If I don’t use it, I got rid of it. This includes paring down dishes, minor appliances, and random things that are supposed to make life easier but don’t (I have legit never used a pineapple core thing, a knife works as well). There are still a few cupboards to go through but it’s a lot easier to manage.

I also got a few dollar store items for organizing–plastic bins for spices/baking supplies, towels/clothes–that I can throw things into without thinking, and some vertical organizers for pans. I am one of those people who leaves pots and baking sheets all over the place because I haaaaaate nesting things for storage. So now I don’t nest; I stow everything either vertically for easy removal/clean-up or commonly used pots are sitting by themselves in the cupboard. I am not stacking shit EVER AGAIN.

I also got rid of my dishrack. I don’t have a dishwasher so clean by hand–I got a microfiber dishmat and that keeps me cleaning dishes regularly otherwise the kitten knocks them over.

 

Bedroom

What really kicked me into gear with my bedroom is that my poor old dog has taken to wandering at night. She’s deaf, partially blind, and has many of the usual old lady maladies, although her bloodwork’s been great. She’s been getting herself trapped in corners and, at one point, I woke to a yelp and couldn’t fucking find her despite sleeping with both doors closed. Turns out she got herself stuck between the bookcase and laundry hamper, and some of the giant pile of laundry fell on her. It was a terrifying few sleep-deprived minutes, and I knew I had to get serious and purge more stuff.

Unfortunately, again, no laundry facilities, but I’ve made a few shifts and I’m purging as I go. If it doesn’t fit in my wardrobe or dresser, it has to go.

It also has given me space to get a new super fancy bed for Sophie.

Took her awhile to understand it’s hers but she’s settled in to sleep. Great bed, highly recommend. pic.twitter.com/9QN671qFPV

— Skyla Dawn Cameron (@skyladawn) November 6, 2017


I’m hoping it’ll help her settle at night. It’s good quality, easy to assemble, and once she got settled she passed out cold for two hours without moving.

 

Living Room

I haven’t actually tackled this room yet, but I looked at my space and what I needed and started making some changes. My couch was getting super uncomfortable and I rarely have guests anyway, so I bought a new-to-me loveseat and it totally changed the space. Gave me more room to use a second end table that can hold my work notepad, medications, etc, and it’s been much easier on my back. Eventually I’ll make my way south through the apartment and start tackling my bookshelves and other items, but already that’s made a big difference.

I’ve also added a small recycling bin (just a blue plastic tote from the dollar store) next to the waste basket in the living room for papers/notes and plastic bottles/cans so I don’t have to sort the garbage later. I’ve done the same thing in my room, and I would in my bathroom too if I had more floor space. SO much easier to sort when you’re tossing something rather than later.

 

So that’s where I am with purging thus far. I’ve had several boxes of goods donated, bags of clothes (with more to go), and a dozen bags of garbage.

The end result is space that’s much easier to keep clean, or–if I’ve had a few rough days and haven’t cleaned–is much less daunting to play catch up with.

I highly recommend the ADHD method if you have a mental illness that shares similar traits. Really, if you find yourself overwhelmed and in tears over organizing and cleaning, this is one way of doing something about it.

Written by Skyla Dawn Cameron · Categorized: blog

Oct 31 2017

(Not Quite) New Release Day!

Happy Halloween! If you’re looking for a story about being haunted, Livi’s novella Ashford’s Ghost is now available on its own in eBook.

Four months ago, Livi successfully killed the afreet who abducted her family and tried to murder her. Then she took over his villa and made ither base of operations/home, as any respectable treasure hunter in need of better digs is wont to do.

But this house is haunted, and she’s starting to think the ancient murderer she used the Seal of Solomon to destroy might not be entirely dead after all. Isolated in the house by a violent snowstorm, Livi is trapped with a dark force gathering strength by the hour, threatening not only the safety of her family but possibly her very sanity.

We now go live to Skyla at her new release celebration.

Kindle | Kobo | iBookstore | Nook | Smashwords | Payhip as well as subscription services like Scribd and Playster.

This is exactly the same as what was in Hauntings: Two Tales of the Paranormal BUT it also has the first three chapters (about 10K words) of the third Livi novel as a bonus. The final ebook will be going out to Patrons of Snark at certain reward levels shortly, though everyone got to read it while it was being posted.

ICYMI, here’s the novella’s playlist.

Below the cut, I’ll past an excerpt.

 

[Read more…]

Written by Skyla Dawn Cameron · Categorized: blog · Tagged: livi talbot, new release

Oct 25 2017

“When’s That Book Coming?” Fall 2017 Edition

What’s New

Hauntings: Two Tales of the Paranormal released in ebook and print back in June.

Tiger’s Memory, a West prequel novella, launched at Patreon for the new West Is Best Club. It won’t be done until next year at the rate rewrites are pushing the wordcount up, but West fans are several chapters into it now.

 

What’s Upcoming

Ashford’s Ghost, originally in Hauntings, will be out next Tuesday as a single download (currently submitted for preorder a few places like Kobo, Kindle, iBooks, Nook, and Payhip, with others coming later in the week).

This is exactly the same novella that was in Hauntings. I owe some Patrons of Snark the final ebook, and I thought it would be fitting to release on Halloween.

It does have the first three chapters of the third Livi novel in the back, which is due out next year.

No, I do not have a release date yet. The (very, very) rough draft is done at 95K words. It needs heavy revision, which I’m hoping to start next month. It might need a few more passes after that, it’s seriously a mess. Best case scenario, it can release spring 2018, otherwise we’re looking at summer.

I’m sorry, I know that sucks. But I’d rather take the time to do some heavy revision and give you a book that’s the best I can make it than rush and publish something subpar. When I have a solid draft, I’ll have it up for preorder immediately and post the date on my upcoming page.

December 1 I’ll be posting a Livi Christmas short story for Patrons of Snark, and it’ll also be a 99c download at Payhip around then. It’s not a wild adventure, just Livi’s first Christmas in the villa. If you’re a Livi/West fan, you may dig it. (No, there is no kissing. There is just the Best Christmas Gift Ever.)

 

What I’m Working On

  • Livi #3 revision.
  • A really terrible gothic romance just for me.
  • Tiger’s Memory.
  • Some short stories that I am not telling you about in case I don’t get them done but if I do, they’ll release in time for Valentine’s Day.

When I get Livi #3 revised, I’m going to start another revision of #4 (I’m on the second draft–I held off polishing it up because I wasn’t sure what would need to change accommodating the new book), and then I’m going to dive into #5 which I am super looking forward to, as it deals with the aftermath of the fourth book and omg I loves me some angst.

Obligatory if you like the books, please leave a review and/or tell a friend, thank you, you’re awesome!

Written by Skyla Dawn Cameron · Categorized: blog · Tagged: livi talbot, state of the union

Oct 15 2017

The Purge: Home Edition

No, not rampant murder for a day, but my apartment (housecleaning is far more scary anyway).

I try to pay attention to synchronicity when it comes up (or else it kicks my ass later); I’ve been thinking about doing something with the sheer, overwhelming mess that is my apartment, and then someone recommended a book on Twitter yesterday, Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD.

I don’t have ADHD, but bipolar disorder presents many of the same challenges–in particular, mania can mimic ADHD behaviors, and depression means basic tasks take ten times as long to do around the house (and that’s if I can get out of bed to do them). I’m hopelessly disorganized, I have to watch myself for impulse spending, and everything is perpetually messy. When I’m well, I try to set things up to be easier on me during a depressive episode in various aspects of my life with proper routine and habits, but when it’s severe, I always fall behind in cleaning. Too much stuff and too little efficiency, makes it that much more difficult. So I checked out the sample, found it helpful, and got the book.

It’s a quick read, laid out to make it easy to follow if you have a short attention span, everything practical and useful. There were quite a few things I do intuitively (remove sliding closet doors so you can see the full closet), and other things that probably should’ve occurred to me (both garbage and recycling bins in every room). And in that regard, there’s a lot that I either do or want to do, and the book provides that permission (don’t fold your laundry when it’s going in a designated drawer), saying it’s okay to give up the things you were taught as “proper” if it means maximizes the efficiency of your space and ease for you to keep it organized.

Right now, I’m starting The Purge. I’m going to aim for roughly a room a week, and I’m starting with the kitchen. Paring down to the necessities, growing okay with running out of particular groceries rather than overbuying, making it easy to put things away. One complication is that I don’t drive, so rather than just hauling a couple of boxes of things to the Sally Ann years ago, I have let it accumulate rather than beg for rides to transport stuff.

The other issue is, of course, so long in poverty. It’s a type of hoarding behavior I didn’t really notice until I saw how the other half lives–normal people upgrade and get rid of the old thing, because if the upgrade breaks, they can just get another.

That has never occurred to me–I thought it was normal to keep everything “just in case”. I still have a fifteen-year-old small LED backup monitor for my computer–it works, and what if my screen dies, and and and–   I wear clothes until there are irreparable holes in them I can’t fix, I keep backup running shoes no matter what shape they’re in. I don’t have hundreds of dollars sitting around to go out and replace something, even a necessity. I have to budget, plan, and even then, I keep backups.

Then there’s food–stocking up on something when it’s on sale in case you can’t afford it next month (or full price next week). Even knowing full well that too many years of eating ramen when it was all I could afford that I would rather starve than eat it now…I still have a supply in my pantry cupboard.

“Just in case.” It’s hard to set aside that fear of being without when it’s always a real possibility.

So there’s certainly some balancing to do for some solutions (particularly advice for the bathroom–like, it’s a small apartment, I don’t even have a counter, just a sink and pipes below) with the realities of poverty, but a lot of it is quite workable.

The goal once I’m through is to have all rooms take about three minutes to clean up. Washing dishes by hand and laundry both obviously take longer, and both are the bane of my existence right behind litter boxes. I’m strongly considering, once I’m through the purging and organizing, looking at a biweekly housekeeper to do a deep clean for a couple of hours on the months my budget permits, keeping some money tucked aside for depressive episodes. I’d rather go a little lighter on groceries or skip my wine for a few months to have that off my plate, just leaving me with regular upkeep.

I post this, then, in case you’re like me and overwhelmed, and need to minimize the amount of time you spend on household crap for whatever reason. If you have chronic depression, the less time you spend on housework and/or overwhelmed by everything you have to do, the more time you have to spend on taking care of yourself.

If you have ADHD or a mental illness that makes organization tough sometimes and have found things that work for you, leave a comment with your tips!

Written by Skyla Dawn Cameron · Categorized: blog

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MEET SKYLA DAWN

Writer of horror, mysteries/thrillers, and urban fantasy.
Fifth-generation crazy cat lady. Bitchy feminist.
So tired all the goddamn time.

My characters kill people so I don’t have to.

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