Resolutions and Goals

I'm one of those people who doesn't do resolutions 'cause they never seem to stick. I very easily slip back into self-destructive patterns, usually due to mood swings, so it does me no good to "resolve" to do something. But I think this year I'll resolve to drink more beer. If I succeed, yay, beer! If I fail, yay for my liver! See? Win-win.

Goals, though. I'm an ambitious person, so I really ought to have those. I have numerous ones in both my personal and professional life that I'm not going to list here because if I'm going to fail, I'd rather not do it publicly. But the number one thing that I will share?

I'm going to chillax.

I have a fighter, alpha personality. It's why I'm good at a lot of things but also why I'm miserable all the time. I get my armour on, my weapon ready, and head charging into battle because I'm cursed not only with the desire to always be right but to make sure everyone else knows it too.

Now, I think fighting is quite healthy, to an extent, so I won't go all soft and hippy on people...BUT my goal is to worry less and pick better battles. Not everything has to be a war. Well, exercising is a war. I got a new sports bra for Christmas (after another fucking battle of trying to find them in my size--WTF, people? DD girls like to exercise too without their tits slapping them in the face while they run!), and putting that thing on is like wearing battle armour. So I think I'll spend my battle energy on physical things, so I'm ready for the zombie invasion. The other things in life? I'm going to work on shrugging them off. My health will improve if I have less stress. And, I mean, last month I was facing weeks without groceries and major financial problems, but generous people stepped in and rescued me, like something out of a made for TV Christmas movie starring a C-level actress as me. I keep facing the worse possible things that could happen in my life, and I somehow survive, so...I'm just going to start trusting rather than worrying.

(Well, excerpt for the zombies--there needs to be some worry there. I mean, I have plans, but I need to be able to outrun them when they evolve to be fast, 28 Days Later ones, plus they could mutate into something that won't be dispatched with just a shovel to the head.)