The same day Agent Cooper arrived, the new treadmill came.
I’m deeply resentful about how much better I feel with that regular walk every morning, but I guess that’s my age. I’m taking all the precautions I can to ensure it lasts longer than two years this time, but who knows.
This may or may not lead to more regular blogging, since I have to do something in the morning while walking and Bsky hasn’t picked up enough to occupy time like scrolling Twitter used to.
Among my physical health, I’m hoping it helps with my burnout right now.
Burnout is one of those injuries where I know I’ll make it worse if I keep pushing, but I don’t have a choice. I have commitments and bills. I can’t afford to pause Patreon, I can’t afford to take a month off of freelancing to recover. I’ve built quarterly breaks into my schedule, or at least theoretically, but I spent the last one either at the vet or in the hospital. Next is planned for September, but that’s pretty far from now when I’m staring down the barrel of everything I have to do.
Regardless, I’m pulling the trigger on Hell Fire, I think, and starting to serialize it the first Friday of every month starting Aug 1. Technically I’ll have November as a break, since the preview of AWKoD posts then, and then Dec, Jan, and Feb should complete it (give or take a month).
I’ve written books while burnt out before and they ended up okay–Odin’s Spear comes to mind, and despite some people not liking that one (always interesting to hear men complaining a story about a woman, by a woman, specifically about a woman feeling held to the whims of others and trapped, as not having sufficient enough “agency” for their male liking) I feel like it turned out well. It did require heavy revision, though.
Hell Fire will probably have to be heavily rewritten later, but I’ve never denied they’re zero drafts when they post. Witch Hunt was in pretty rough shape too. I’m just hoping this one isn’t as bad as I’m afraid it is (how’s that for a selling point–sign up for Patreon! lol).
To that end, I’ve got a sale up not only for Blood Ties (Elis #1) but also the Demons of Oblivion boxset over at Payhip. Hell Fire is about Elis and her budding misandrist girl gang heading into Oblivion, so it’s probably a good idea to read the OG series though not necessary.
Both are 50% off with the coupon code HELLFIRE

Good until September 1.
*checks watch* I’m at 4200 steps so far. I’ll get another thousand or so in and call it good until this afternoon.
Dr’s appointment next week, which I’ve been really nervous about–like anxiety through the roof, I had to take one of the few benzos I had left. If I have to switch to an extremely expensive medication, it’s going to create a huge headache with some other things (not going into detail). Talked it over with a friend, though, who made it seem that much more manageable. It’ll still be a pain in the ass, but at least I’ll have a place to start, so while I’m not exactly calm, I’m no longer chewing the inside of my mouth bloody.
Tuesday I needed bloodwork done ahead of the visit and I came out looking like this (technically this is yesterday, but yeah, it’s bad).

I didn’t realize until I was sitting in the chair that the girl was a trainee and I had no idea what she was doing. I have tricky veins but I used to get weekly blood draws at one point due to my medication, so I know where the good veins are. This was, hands down, the worst blood draw I’ve ever had, and consider for a moment they were so bad when I was a kid that I was traumatized and went almost twenty years without bloodwork again.
It hurts less than it did Tuesday (my entire forearm ached all day afterward) but yeah, she clearly blew the vein. And yes, I’m putting arnica cream on it. That’s still what it looks like.
So that’s what’s new here.
At least I have Agent Cooper Barbie.
Oof. My dead-eyed stare gets a workout when they ignore my initial “Please just take it out of the back of my hand, I’m begging you” and proceed to make me look like both arms have been beaten with a hammer before *checks notes* taking it out of the big, juicy vein right on the surface of the back of my hand.
Sending good “give Skyla a break (not the bony kind)” vibes in your direction.
That’s ridiculous, too, because starting at the hand is usually the best option, right? (from what I gather)
Based on my limited knowledge, I think it’s the cephalic vein that’s best for me but you have to get it from my forearm, not in the elbow crease but an inch over on top of my arm. It isn’t visible but you can feel it, if you know what you’re doing and take your time. Same thing in the hospital last month–I pointed it out (granted, I was a bit dehydrated) and the nurse decided to try my hand first. Perfed the vein. Tried my forearm but I don’t think she got anywhere near it. Called over a second nurse who checked both arms and then got the IV in first try *in the spot I’d been saying*
Sometimes they get snippy with me when I do my rehearsed “Here are where the good veins are, please only try if you’re sure you’ll get it” etc like I’m questioning their job ability, but this is what happens when they don’t. So when I have to book again, I’m asking ahead of time to be placed with someone experienced. They should’ve at least asked my consent before having a trainee stab me.